The Development Exponent: A Leadership Perspective
Bruce Holoubek
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How Empathic Investigations Impact Workplace Culture
One of the most powerful and skills a leader can have is the ability to have difficult conversations, sometimes really difficult conversations – with empathy, humanity, and compassion. Human being to human being. That’s what really stood out in my conversation with Certified Forensic Interviewer Angela Nino. Her path from criminal justice major to 911 operator to loss prevention specialist to expert in workplace investigations is fascinating. Within just minutes of speaking with her, you automatically want to become a better communicator. She makes you think differently. Makes you consider leadership with a real “walk a mile in someone’s shoes” type lens. I don’t know about you, but the thought of interviewing someone for theft, misappropriation, misconduct, or a criminal act conjures up good cop/bad cop interrogation room television or movie scenes. Not necessarily a thoughtful, graceful, emotion-based approach to ensuring that the person on the other side of the table feels seen, heard, and understood. The way Angela breaks it down, however, it completely makes sense. People act and react based on emotions. If they sense that “authentic connection” and feel seen, listened to, and actually heard – it stands to reason they’ll be more likely to open up and tell their story, even if it means being fired or arrested. They want to be heard. Frankly, don’t we all? I loved how she pointed out that by the time we get to that point, when someone is headed out the door, sometimes in handcuffs, it’s almost too late for empathy. That connection should start day one on the job or in the interview process and every day after. Leaders have the ability to change the culture of employee behavior from the outset. Does that mean things like theft or misconduct won’t happen? Of course not. But when leaders look at a person first as a person – and create trust and promote empathy in the workplace, there’s a lot better stage for loyalty and committed behavior. For some leaders, this might be a lot to take in. They’ve been in “boss mode” for a long time and the idea of being present in the moment and coming from a place of compassion just doesn’t feel like it’s in the cards. I think what Angela shares goes a long way to make an argument for change in that thinking. When you can take difficult situations and tough conversations and connect with an emotion that someone else is feeling – that’s powerful. For example, letting someone go is not easy for most people. Likewise, being told, “You’re fired,” is difficult, frustrating, and painful. You look bad as a leader if you handle it poorly. Angela tells a story of a team member who was let go, and, against her wishes, was walked out in cuffs by a police officer through the middle of the store. That wasn’t OK with her and it became a defining moment. She called the entire team together and explained that was not how things were done and shifted the narrative about what had just transpired, and in turn, shifted the culture for the organization. “Culture is built in everyday moments and tested in the difficult ones,” she said. That’s game changing. Imagine yourself in both seats. As a leader and as an employee who’s about to be fired. It’s not small thing in our world to be mindful that the way you handle someone on the last day of work – could be the difference between whether they come back in a violent way. We have to be sensitive to that. So, how can you manage that conversation? Instead of blame and shame, can you say something along the lines of, “Let’s walk through the process of what happens next.” Then talk about it. How you get where they are, and you want to help them get through this transition with as much ease as possible. That’s in everyone’s best interest, right? Talk about what happens when someone calls for a reference. Angela talks about how she’s cleared halls so that a person could leave with
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