Love Inside Out with Adele Testa
Adele The Coach
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6. The Performance Trap: Stop trying to earn love!
Why do we perform in our most intimate relationships? This episode unpacks where the belief that love must be earned comes from—and how to finally step off the treadmill. In this episode, we explore The Performance Trap: that exhausting pattern of monitoring yourself, proving your worth, and secretly fearing that if you stop performing, you'll lose their love. You'll learn:→ The difference between effort (authentic) and performance (an audition)→ 5 sources that taught us love must be earned—from childhood conditioning to social media→ The Treadmill vs. Home metaphor: why couples often play completely different games→ How women and men perform differently in relationships→ The real cost of constant performance—and how to break the cycle→ Practical "Heart Work" exercises to reconnect with your authentic self
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