The Carlötta Beautox Chronicles

4.8 (104)
COMEDY FICTION
SERIES

A screwball comedy fiction podcast that follows the misadventures of a wanna-be actress as she navigates the treacherous waters of Hollywood in her quest to become the Next Big Thing.

EPISODE 1

Vomit Draft -- Ep301

Vomit Draft -- Ep 301 After being cancelled and with her life now in shambles, Carlötta must rewrite the narrative of her life all while a pandemic rages. It's like dancing backwards in high heels. So 2020. CAST: Samantha Gordon as Carlötta Beautox Trevor Lissauer as Dave Sarah Agor as The Spirit Cougar Victoria Hansen as Khloe Kardashian Chelsea Kwoka as The Karen App Kiba Walker as Zen Siri as Siri Written/Produced/Directed/Edited/Sound Designed by Ann Sloan (aka She Who Shall Not Be Named) MUSIC: “Carlotta Beautox Theme” by Jesse Billson for Sonic Librarian. Lyrics by Ann Sloan "Scheming Weasel" by Kevin MacLeod (https://incompetech.com) License: CC BY (http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/4.0/) "March of the Spoons" by Kevin MacLeod (https://incompetech.com) License: CC BY (http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/4.0/) "Ascending the Vale" Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com) Licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 3.0 License http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/3.0/ "Hall of the Mountain King" Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com) Licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 4.0 License http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/4.0/ SFX: From FreeSound.org and SoundBible.com. Please visit our website at CarlottaPodcast.com for full list of sound effects listed in this episode. For more information including transcripts visit: CarlottaPodcast.com Proud member of the Fable and Folly network. Visit us at FableandFolly.com Find and support our sponsors @FableandFolly.com/sponsors. And visit our TeePublic store for Carlötta Beautox branded merchandise! http://tee.pub/lic/nr17y0CPzHw Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

18 min
EPISODE 2

Malibu Rehab -- Ep302

A rehab for canceled people? Sign Carlötta Beautox up! Ever since Twitter declared her dunzo, she's been trying to find a path forward and chilling in Malibu for 28 days might be just the ticket! CAST: Samantha Gordon as Carlötta Beautox Trevor Lissauer as Dave David Allen as Herb, Rehab Client 1, Mel Gibson, Lifetime Announcer Kristi Boulton as Lori Loughlin, Southern Woman 2.5 David S. Dear as Consequences Man, Rehab Client 2 Sarah Golding as Rita Chelsea Kwoka as Repercussions Commercial Announcer Siri as Herself Written/Produced/Directed/Edited/Sound Designed by Ann Sloan (aka She Who Shall Not Be Named) MUSIC: “Carlotta Beautox Theme” by Jesse Billson for Sonic Librarian. Lyrics by Ann Sloan "Ascending the Vale" Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com) Licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 3.0 License http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/3.0/ "Thinking Music" by Kevin MacLeod (https://incompetech.com) Licence: CC BY (http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/4.0/) "Peppy Pepe" by Kevin MacLeod (https://incompetech.com) License: CC BY (http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/4.0/) "Umbrella Pants" by Kevin MacLeod (https://incompetech.com) Licence: CC BY (http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/4.0/) News Theme 2 by Audionautix is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution license (https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/4.0/) Artist: http://audionautix.com/ "Two Together" by Kevin MacLeod (https://incompetech.com) License: CC BY (http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/4.0/) "There is Romance" by Kevin MacLeod (https://incompetech.com) License: CC BY (http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/4.0/) SFX: From FreeSound.org and SoundBible.com. Please visit our website at CarlottaPodcast.com for full list of sound effects listed in this episode. For more information including transcripts visit: CarlottaPodcast.com Proud member of the Fable and Folly network. Visit us at FableandFolly.com Find and support our sponsors @FableandFolly.com/sponsors. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

24 min
EPISODE 3

Eat the Rich -- Ep303

Carlötta lands a job at LA's most exclusive hot spot -- a concept restaurant from visionary chef Joaquin Oops -- as part of her deep undercover mission to expose the 1%'s tastiest secret. CAST: Samantha Gordon as Carlötta Beautox Trevor Lissauer as Dave David Allen as Angry Patron 1 Timothy "Funny Guy Timmy" Banfield as Chris...I mean...Christopher W. The Manager David S. Dear as Server 1 and Angry Patron 2 Sarah Golding as Training Tape Voice Chelsea Kwoka as Server 2 and Angry Patron 3 Raechel Wong as Angry Patron 4 Siri as Herself Written/Produced/Directed/Edited/Sound Designed by Ann Sloan (aka She Who Shall Not Be Named) MUSIC: Carlotta Beautox Theme by Jesse Billson for Sonic Librarian. Lyrics by Ann Sloan Bushwick Tarentella - Thatched Villagers by Kevin MacLeod is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution license (https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/4.0/) Source: http://incompetech.com/music/royalty-free/index.html?isrc=USUAN1300002 Artist: http://incompetech.com/ On My Way by Kevin MacLeod -- Link: https://incompetech.filmmusic.io/song/4163-on-my-way License: http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/4.0/ Scheming Weasel (faster version) by Kevin MacLeod (https://incompetech.com) License: CC BY (http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/4.0/) Cool Vibes by Kevin MacLeod (https://incompetech.com) Licence: CC BY (http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/4.0/) SFX: From FreeSound.org and SoundBible.com. Please visit our website at CarlottaPodcast.com for full list of sound effects listed in this episode. For more information including transcripts visit: CarlottaPodcast.com Proud member of the Fable and Folly network. Visit us at FableandFolly.com Find and support our sponsors @FableandFolly.com/sponsors. https://vurbl.com/station/9O8izWzfkp9/ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

18 min
EPISODE 4

The Problem With Problematic -- Ep304

Carlötta has a problem -- she's been deemed "problematic". Luckily, there's an exclusive media agency that has a solution on how to rescue her career from the depths of oblivion. CAST: Samantha Gordon as Carlötta Beautox Trevor Lissauer as Dave Kristi Boulton as Lil Kaia David Allen as Brad Ryan Manuel as Chad 2 Justin Mayer as Chad 2 Kiba Walker as Zen Raechel Wong as Angry Patron 4 Siri as Herself Written/Produced/Directed/Edited/Sound Designed by Ann Sloan (aka She Who Shall Not Be Named) MUSIC: Carlotta Beautox Theme by Jesse Billson for Sonic Librarian. Lyrics by Ann Sloan "March of the Spoons" by Kevin MacLeod (https://incompetech.com) License: CC BY (http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/4.0/) "Cool Vibes" by Kevin MacLeod (https://incompetech.com) Licence: CC BY (http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/4.0/) "Umbrella Pants" by Kevin MacLeod (https://incompetech.com) Licence: CC BY (http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/4.0/) SFX: From FreeSound.org and SoundBible.com. Please visit our website at CarlottaPodcast.com for full list of sound effects listed in this episode. For more information including transcripts visit: CarlottaPodcast.com Proud member of the Fable and Folly network. Visit us at FableandFolly.com Find and support our sponsors @FableandFolly.com/sponsors. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

21 min
EPISODE 5

Podicitis -- Ep305

Carlötta goes to a podcast convention to learn all about the industry and meets the heaviest hitters in the biz! CAST: Samantha Gordon as Carlötta Beautox Trevor Lissauer as Dave David Allen as Rick Wrecked Kristi Boulton as Karen Miller Oystein Brager as Himself (The Amelia Project Podcast) Sean Howard as Himself (Civilized Podcast, Alba Salix, The End of Time and Other Bothers, The Axe and Crown) Justin Mayer as Podicitis MC and Convention-goer Ann Sloan as Convention Hall Announcer Raul Vega as Himself (Rose Drive Podcast and Swiss & Lali Hijack Hollywood Podcast) Kate Wallinga as Herself (Ignorance Was Bliss Podcast) Rick Zieff as Bob Smith Siri as Herself Written/Produced/Directed/Edited/Sound Designed by Ann Sloan (aka What's-Her-Face) MUSIC: Carlotta Beautox Theme by Jesse Billson for Sonic Librarian. Lyrics by Ann Sloan Bushwick Tarentella - Thatched Villagers by Kevin MacLeod is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution license (https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/4.0/) Source: http://incompetech.com/music/royalty-free/index.html?isrc=USUAN1300002 Artist: http://incompetech.com/ Scheming Weasel (faster version) by Kevin MacLeod (https://incompetech.com) License: CC BY (http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/4.0/) Cool Vibes by Kevin MacLeod (https://incompetech.com) Licence: CC BY (http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/4.0/) News Theme 2 by Audionautix is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution license (https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/4.0/) Artist: http://audionautix.com/ "NewsSting" by Kevin MacLeod (https://incompetech.com) License: CC BY (http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/4.0/) "March of the Spoons" by Kevin MacLeod (https://incompetech.com) License: CC BY (http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/4.0/) SFX: From FreeSound.org and SoundBible.com. Please visit our website at CarlottaPodcast.com for full list of sound effects listed in this episode. For more information including transcripts visit: CarlottaPodcast.com Proud member of the Fable and Folly network. Visit us at FableandFolly.com Find and support our sponsors @FableandFolly.com/sponsors. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

21 min
EPISODE 6

Bowling for Karaoke -- Ep306

When Dave opens LA's hottest new nightclub: a hybrid Bowling Alley and Karaoke Bar, the royal family makes an appearance. For Carlötta, it's the stuff fairy tales are made of! CAST: Samantha Gordon as Carlötta Beautox Trevor Lissauer as Dave Justin Mayer as the Karaoke MC Riannah Pouncy as the Louboutins Ann Sloan as all the terrible singers Siri as Herself Written/Produced/Directed/Edited/Sound Designed by Ann Sloan (aka What's-Her-Face) MUSIC: Carlotta Beautox Theme by Jesse Billson for Sonic Librarian. Lyrics by Ann Sloan Scheming Weasel (faster version) by Kevin MacLeod (https://incompetech.com) License: CC BY (http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/4.0/) NewsSting by Kevin MacLeod (https://incompetech.com) License: CC BY (http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/4.0/) Disco Sting by Kevin MacLeod Link: https://incompetech.filmmusic.io/song/3653-disco-sting License: http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/4.0/ Evening Melodrama by Kevin MacLeod (https://incompetech.com) License: CC BY (http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/4.0/) Egmont Overture Finale by Kevin MacLeod (https://incompetech.com) License: CC BY (http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/4.0/) The Chamber Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com) Licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 3.0 Licensehttp://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/3.0/ Not As It Seems Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com) Licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 3.0 Licensehttp://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/3.0/ SFX: From FreeSound.org and SoundBible.com. Please visit our website at CarlottaPodcast.com for full list of sound effects listed in this episode. For more information including transcripts visit: CarlottaPodcast.com Proud member of the Fable and Folly network. Visit us at FableandFolly.com Find and support our sponsors @FableandFolly.com/sponsors. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

23 min
EPISODE 7

A Raisin in the Potato Salad -- Ep307

Carlötta's new podcast --Kitty Chats -- is a massive hit and she's become a media darling all over again! But America's #1 Karen, leader of the anti-mask movement known as ANTIMA, has cooked up a recipe to destroy Carlötta for good! CAST: Samantha Gordon as Carlötta Beautox Trevor Lissauer as Dave Kristi Boulton as Karen Miller and Rachel Meadow Justin Mayer as Sean Calamity Ann Sloan as Newscaster Siri as Herself Kiba Walker as Zen Written/Produced/Directed/Edited/Sound Designed by Ann Sloan (aka What's-Her-Face) THIS EPISODE SPONSORED BY: MUSIC: Carlotta Beautox Theme by Jesse Billson for Sonic Librarian. Lyrics by Ann Sloan NewsSting by Kevin MacLeod (https://incompetech.com) License: CC BY (http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/4.0/) Music from https://filmmusic.io "Peppy Pepe" by Kevin MacLeod (https://incompetech.com) License: CC BY (http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/4.0/) Tiki Bar Mixer by Kevin MacLeod Link: https://incompetech.filmmusic.io/song/6836-tiki-bar-mixer License: http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/4.0/ Evil March by Kevin MacLeod Link: https://incompetech.filmmusic.io/song/3724-evil-march License: http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/4.0/\ "Voltaic" Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com) Licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 3.0 License http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/3.0/ Life of Riley by Kevin MacLeod Link: https://incompetech.filmmusic.io/song/3976-life-of-riley License: http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/4.0/ Music from https://filmmusic.io: "Umbrella Pants" by Kevin MacLeod (https://incompetech.com) License: CC BY (http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/4.0/) SFX: From FreeSound.org and SoundBible.com. Please visit our website at CarlottaPodcast.com for full list of sound effects listed in this episode. For more information including transcripts visit: CarlottaPodcast.com Proud member of the Fable and Folly network. Visit us at FableandFolly.com Find and support our sponsors @FableandFolly.com/sponsors. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

19 min
EPISODE 8

Revenge of the Karens -- Ep308

The Season 3 Finale! When Karen Miller, leader of the anti-mask movement (ANTIMA), mobilizes an army of peri-menopausal moms to silence Carlötta, it's going to be a riot. CAST: Samantha Gordon as Carlötta Beautox Trevor Lissauer as Dave Kristi Boulton as Karen Miller Chelsea Kwoka as Karen 2 Justin Mayer as Anderson Cooper Riannah Pouncy as Karen 3 Ann Sloan as Karen 4 Siri as Herself Kiba Walker as Zen Kate Wallinga as Herself Written/Produced/Directed/Edited/Sound Designed by Ann Sloan (aka What's-Her-Face) For discount codes, visit our sponsors at FableAndFolly.com/sponsors MUSIC: Carlotta Beautox Theme by Jesse Billson for Sonic Librarian. Lyrics by Ann Sloan Music from https://filmmusic.io "Peppy Pepe" by Kevin MacLeod (https://incompetech.com) License: CC BY (http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/4.0/) Music from https://filmmusic.io "There is Romance" by Kevin MacLeod (https://incompetech.com) License: CC BY (http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/4.0/) SFX: From FreeSound.org and SoundBible.com. Please visit our website at CarlottaPodcast.com for full list of sound effects listed in this episode. For more information including transcripts visit: CarlottaPodcast.com Proud member of the Fable and Folly network. Visit us at FableandFolly.com Find and support our sponsors @FableandFolly.com/sponsors. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

24 min
SEASON 3 TRAILER

Season Twah Trailer

Welcome to our 3rd season! Carlötta's life is in les toilettes and she must find a way to claw her way out by any memes necessary. Written, produced, directed, edited, sound designed by Ann Sloan. CAST: Samantha Gordon as Carlötta Beautox Trevor Lissauer as Dave Kiba Walker as Zen Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

2 min

See All Season 3 (9)

4.8

out of 5

104 Ratings

Positively, perfectly hilarious

Mar 20

Spesh713

This was exactly what I needed after my long workday. All three seasons were so good. I laughed out loud during each episode. The writing, editing, acting, sound engineering, everything—the entire production—was incredible. Highly recommend.
Perfect Getaway!

12/21/2021

HarleySun7

So thankful for this podcast!! I’m not into dark, criminal podcasts… but I’m also not into self help or lovey dovey ones .. I really just wanted a world I could escape into and this is it !! It’s funny, lovely to listen to, and fun!! Yay!! Thank you to everyone who’s a part of this. It’s seriously so well done. Quality podcast!!
Must listen

09/28/2021

Pats Fan 28

This is an incredible podcast! Those days when you need a getaway from the crime series and want something to make you laugh out loud, forget all your troubles and makes your day fly, this is the podcast for you!! You will completely enjoy!
KISS!

06/07/2021

cmcturn

KISS!

A screwball comedy fiction podcast that follows the misadventures of a wanna-be actress as she navigates the treacherous waters of Hollywood in her quest to become the Next Big Thing.